Huun-Huur-Tu's New Music Video

Sexiest Pope Ever!

Nothing like the philosophical detritus blood of a Roman-Jew mating with the viscus introspective blood of a Patagonia-bound Caveman!  There's a reason why Argentina is the new Rio for kitschy wealthy Americans.  Just keep Michael Cain away from their daughters!!!

Is this not a US Government ploy to keep us spending money in the sexiest place on Earth?  

Just look at that Pope..."ooooo-weeee you good lookin'!!! (As John Travolta said to Nick Cage who was really John Travolta playing Nick Cage and vice-versa) Speaking of John Travolta, this Pope is like John Travolta dressed as Rocky Balboa!  

In this corner, weighing 125lbs, standing  5'-5", with an unprecedented 2.3 million women laid! The Italian-Argentinian Stallion-Guanaco, Pope Jorge Mario Bergoglio!!!

Yo Argentina! If yous' can change!?! And I's can change!?! Then we all's can change!?!

The Hollow Death and Cosmic Rebirth of Paul Verhoeven

I was reading a review of Hollow Man by Kathi Maio taken from Fantasy & Science Fiction.  Kathi aims to prove 3 points in my estimation:

1) That Hollow Man is a blatant plagiarism of HG Well's The Invisible Man.  Yes. This is fairly obvious. This point is well stated but no big genius yet.  

2) That writer Andrew G. Marlowe is a shitty writer.  Yup.  He is, without a doubt, a joke.   He has written 3 films to date: 

1. Air Force One - Overrated.  Fodder for Hollywood Producer investment portfolios at the heyday of the 90's action-blockbuster genera.  
2. End of Days - critically panned and for good reason since it's Rosmary's Baby born out of the fornication of The Exorcist and The Omen and passed off as an original screenplay.  
3. Hollow Man - Lovely!  The completion of his trilogy!  He's shocked and awed and entertained us all like Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost with the holy trinity of Horror, Action, Sci-Fi...only wait! He got Action and Horror out of order! or is it Sci-Fi and Horror...wait which one of these is Sci-Fi?  The story in Hollow Man is basically this: HG Well's The Invisible Man lifted with magnum force and thrown into a underground bunker in the year 2000 complete with a piece of Bacon fighting a Shue for soulless love, until the subterranean oven starts (Josh) Broilin' and the Bacon starts sizzlin'....everything disappears including the Bacon, leaving the Shue cooked in (Josh) Broilin's oven!  I have absolutely no issue with eroding Andrew Marlowe into dust through a "simple" history lesson as old as time.  His ideas are pointless and without vision.

3) That director Paul Verhoeven has become an "arrogant soul."  Note: As 3's always seem to go, this is the kicker....this is that which removes the "simple" from the History Lesson...so this one's not so cut and dry.  Knowing that even Starship Troopers, with all it's shittiness is still a fucking awesome watch, wouldn't I naturally become offended?  Verhoeven is awesome:  Robocop, Basic Instinct, Total Recall!  The reviewer seems to agree, stating that Verhoeven is that "infamous pornographer of violence and sleaze."  What a statement!  And one I certainly can rally behind.  Ok, so who/what gives?

Well for starters, Hollow Man sucks!  If you don't believe us, start by watching HG Well's Invisible Man (1933).  Where Starship Troopers had just enough of a ridiculous factor to work, Hollow Man plays it much straighter.  Just watch Elizabeth Shue's worried/confused face telling you all you need to know and listen for the deep crackle of some transparent, yet overcooked Bacon saying "It's amazing what you can do when you don't have to look at yourself in the mirror every day."  Follow Andrew Marlowe's Twisterized plot with its culturally inbreed Science-geek love triangles, as he whittles down top-secret government research in a maximum security bunker to cheap horror gaffs and fake-breasted rape scenes.  It's a moot point, when you examine it.  Varhoeven out grew his britches with Hollow Man...in the sense that his head burst through them.  This happens a lot in Hollywood.  Your growing head turns to an ugly head, easily rearing itself if you're not the sole proprietor of a project's writing/directing/producing, which is why most true artists spread out their work over the years.  It's a difficult thing to undergo, unless you're Woody Allen, but even he has been rearing his ugly head over the last dozen years or so, its just so puny and sniveling no one seems to notice (how else does one explain the critical success of Match Point).  

With Hollow Man, Verhoeven looks more like cheap Hollywood garbage washed ashore, rather than the timeless vessel that carries wonderful garbage to empty shores.  Kathi Maio sees in Verhoeven's Hollow Man what many people point to: failure to properly source one's work, and for that he's a joke.  I'd have to agree with the reviewer, even as she admits to Verhoeven claiming "he discovered the source inspiration for his latest film in the work of ancient Greek philosopher, Plato."  That's a kick ass thing to say, but only if one of 2 things been is present: 

1. Plato showing up anywhere in the point Hollow Man aims to make (*Note: it makes no point)
2. Plato being anywhere in the director's vision employed in Hollow Man (*Note: there is no vision).  But...it doesn't even have to be Verhoeven, what about the vision James Whale employs in 1993 with The Invisible Man?  But isn't that another moot point since nowhere in Hollow Man is the idea of the Mind referenced along with the Body and the Soul like HG Wells so purposefully works out In The Invisible Man.  This almost proves it's not plagiarism since the story is so different thematically, being a barren wasteland aiming to generate revenue from an altogether different wasteland, increasingly barren but full of green paper.  

I know Verhoevan has sworn off working with outside writers for now, so maybe it's lesson learned for the great entertainer.  Before he became the arbiter of other people's less the perfect, but always riotous scripts, he made 2 films staring Rutger Hauer: Soldier of Orange (1977) and Flesh+Blood (1985).  Since Hollow Man, he returned to writing/directing efforts with Blackbook (2006) & Steekspel (2011), but I know nothing of them beyond the fact they DO NOT have a blood-thirsty Rutger Hauer which isn't as easy as you may think. 

So it's my review of the reviewer, that another job well done has been done to save the life of a worth while entertainer.  She's made her 3 points and the 3rd, as 3rd's do, has created something...a new movie-making future for Verhoeven.  What he does with it, is entirely up to him...just like the the butler Andrew says to Goldie Hawn in Overboard.  If only all of us had a personal Roddy McDowell as our life-critic.  Rather profound movie that Overboard...shows us the importance of looking at things by whatever means necessary, even if that means Society says "we've gone too far."  

2011 Primavera Sounds X-File

2nd to last billing for a legend and anyone that saw this, touched star dust and left a bread crumb trail for all the homeless souls off playing Autolux Tennis in the Fiery Furnaces of their temporal Cults...

On the Alabama Mix

Don't Resurrect the Dead

That computer-literate yin of Tommy Wiseau's yang, James Nugyen is at it again.  His long-awaited(?) follow up to the cult hit Birdemic: Shock & Terror now boasts a sleek trailer - including shots of Hollywood Blvd, an even hotter unknown blonde and crisper GGI imagery of 2D Eagletures.  But this time a familiar question looms at the heart of what makes art relevant: "Why are the Eagles and Vulture Attack?" Let me say that again: "Why are the Eagles and Vulture Attack?"

If Tommy Wiseau actually made a Room sequel, everyone would go nuts!  Something like uhhhhh I dunno: The Room 2: Tommy's Resurrection????  He could bring back Chris R...better than ever! Now with more than 5 fuckin' minutes for Denny!  Claudette would of course be dealing with the results of the test and dying of Breast Cancer, whereby frequent street football interludes would serve as levity.  The formula would appear too good to be true.  But alas, Tommy Wiseau, for as long as he remains an artist that wants to tell the truth of a unified collective consciousness amongst humanity, will not make a sequel.  Thank Tommy for that.  Because The Room 2 would only discredit the efforts that he so painstakingly underwent to make The Room a shitty movie that resonates with everyone who sees it.

Birdemic 2: The Resurrection is going to be a mockery of Birdemic (and the larger good bad movie genera) and it appears that my suspicion as to the true nature of James Nugyen the movie director has come true.  Honestly, the guy's website has a TM symbol next to "Romantic Thriller."  He's cashing in on making himself a boob. This will be an offensive, brain-cell-killing film to anyone looking at it from a standpoint of fandom.

Many people will absolutely love this Birdemic sequel, contribute to the movie, and further it's success, enabling James Nugyen to continue to cite Alfred Hitchcock on larger and larger stages turning himself into the idiot-savant I had hoped he was not.

Tommy Wiseau is not an idiot savant.  He's an artist who has committed to a craft.  He's brilliant. Completely misunderstood, but accepting of that and continuing to bridge gaps.

The James Nguyen model seems aimed at further polarizing Society by perpetuating the stereotypes of "lesser artists" and clueless observation in a talentless arena.

Waste no time with Birdemic 2: The Resurrection.  Good bad movies and potential cult classics are a product of misunderstanding, calamity and hammer-headed sentiments rather than the half-wit rallying efforts made by bastians of compassionate world shakers, and the wide-eyes of a money grubber.

In the meantime, let's all stick random discoveries, and Nguyen classics like Julie & Jack (2003).

Mad Freshy 90's

Quicksilver

Hurley

Billabong

Rusty

Redsand

O'neil

Mossimo

Stussy

No Fear

Volcom

- Fox Racing

- Roxy (girl version of Quicksilver)

- Reef

- RVCA

- Matix

- Rip Curl

- ...lost?

- Bad Boys Club (from Aaron)

- Element

- Ezekiel

- Nixon

Morey Boogie

skate brands included?

such as Stussy or Supreme?

Etnies

Vans

Adio

DC

Shorty's

World Industries

Independent

Girl

Think

Maple

Birdhouse

Krux (trux)

Lakai

Spitfire

Flip
Es

Cainianity

Feminist? Festivus.

She asked, "what do you want for diner?"

He won his first and only prize because dinner was reverent. The mere mention now sends chaos shots fired into the dark of his brain. Creation's radiation washed over him.  Now awake in the swirling and ripping ripples of starry ancient winds, sucking his chaotic thoughts into the burning twister of time-space.

A messenger dust body sent to vacuum up remaining fragments of true beauty and extol the refuse of linear time and space was now imbibing him.  Life giving liquid flashed before his heart and splashed off cardio-tendrils into the polluted innards of his host body - a trashy beach on Sagan's cosmic shore.

Like mythical Halcyon hovering at the crossroads of reliable forest and unpredictable sea, and some eons later that cross-dressing midwife Agnodice of Greece, he felt the female spirit rise up to service him from within, causing survival messengers to grow just and fair in his holy handed-heart.

Still,  only fragments of reality dotted his land from time to time like artifacts under sediment or lights over phoenix and under classified stamps.  The hold-outs from the last "great war" of his time needed a trampoline made of spam to touch star dust. It all stayed botched without femininity, somehow incomplete.

And where the rise of clitoral underdevelopment expanded the minds of worthwhile men, always stood a hold-out, complete with Dino DNA and double barrel scotch - playing the fool for the body of knowledge.

Forever pushing upon a force, there remains another force,  until universal-scaled conflict redefines what we have become and are to become.   And in fact, what is to become of us? And why does this man care?

Is he not sipping his spirits on indigo pools of the finest, aged to perfection sand? Who among him could believe that such death could carry his sack of rotting calcium deposits into the conscious dark matter that binds all in a see-through future perception reception of reality.

He'll not write an invitation to a future party like Steven Hawking, but rather join her in singing "turnstile blues" in line at Whole Foods as they both plan the immediate future, reusable bag, Burberry and Barbour, gluten-free tofu play-dough unborn daughter, Catskill trout and arguments over all-purpose Shout and endless plotting toward the immediate future with so little at stake, except steak.

The leather jacket with the tassels please

Things I learned from Fire Down Below: 

1. Steven Segal helps Harry Dean Stanton remove Kris Kristofferson's "toxic wastes" from Levon Helm's Appalachian Mennonite community
2. After the 3rd Leather Trench Coat is acquired, bolo tie not necessary
3. PB & J w/ Spam is Steven Segal's favorite sandwich
4. This movie is so good it inspired the movie Radical Jack staring Billy Ray Cirus
5. Sell all your honey and accept rides from the man with the leather jacket and the big red truck
6.  "The trouble with rich people is that sometimes they don't care about........others"
7. Budget = $60 million

• $55,000,000 (Segal)
• $1,000,000 (Levon Helm)
• $35,000 (Kristofferson)
• $3,965,000 (rights to Jimi Hendrix's "Little Wing")